I've returned to an old love and pastime of mine: interviewing personalities and creative makers in the community around me -- this time on the show "Impact."
My first interview was two weeks ago, in late October, with actor, producer, multi-talented and committed to his art, Kevin Craig West. If you like, you can check it out on my Facebook page.
Wow - amazing - all the catching up I need to do with social media now that I'm putting myself out there in the spotlight, again. I'll definitely be keeping you up to date on all I'm learning as I go along -- and I definitely welcome your input. I've got a lot to learn -- no man, or woman, is an island. Not that I've been out on an island all this time.
Let's just say that I've been in the dark woods of a deep forest and am slowly coming out to see the forest from the trees.
And now I'm all about what this great big world -- and the community around me -- has to offer. "Think Global, Act Local," as they say.
Stay tuned... I'll be taking you along on my journey.
Wow - it's good to be back out of the woods.
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Thursday, June 2, 2011
Getting through the Conflict in My Own Story - Her Telling Heart
I have two artistic identities -- one, as Heidi Philipsen, actor and writer; the other, as Eli Meissner (short for Elizabeth), as director and producer.
Why? You ask.
Well, we all have two sides, the one in control who calls the shots and the vulnerable one who learns to take them and process them creatively.
This last year has taken me on a journey in film making that connects both of those personas and leads them down one road. Funny, my last film, A FORK IN THE ROAD, was about choices between two paths in life. This next one, HER TELLING HEART, is about reconciling those choices in one's heart.
But it's not easy reconciling a life's journey in one's heart, especially if that journey had traumatic moments which have never been let out to see the light of day... consciously, that is. And this film, a short, narrative adaptation of Edgar Allan Poe's "The Telltale Heart," has taken me into my own 'heart of darkness' parallel to the challenges one has in making a film.
When I was five, I was made to be a victim, over and over again. The trouble with being victimized when you are that young is that all it does is set you up for a life of victimization and abuse -- a finely lined walk between the roles of victim and abuser -- unless you get serious help.
I never told anyone about it and held it in for years -- held it in so tightly that my life depended on it. Faith, work, sports and understanding angels disguised as "mortal" friends made it all bearable. And yet, in retrospect, I would guess that many people close to me saw it, suspected it. Still, I was so sure I could fool everyone into thinking I was fine and my world was perfect.
Our society walks a fine line between dictating perfection and individualism any way. Always trying to be perfect and fit in perfectly... even when you don't want to and you shouldn't. Let's face it: perfection is an obsessive illusion.
And so, as it often goes with one's psyche, all of the hurt and pain and trauma had to be let out some way, some time; for me, that all came out in the creation of HER TELLING HEART. It's one thing if you just write a piece and be done with it. It's another, altogether, if you see it through from start to finish on screen.
More soon... see the next post coming soon...
Why? You ask.
Well, we all have two sides, the one in control who calls the shots and the vulnerable one who learns to take them and process them creatively.
This last year has taken me on a journey in film making that connects both of those personas and leads them down one road. Funny, my last film, A FORK IN THE ROAD, was about choices between two paths in life. This next one, HER TELLING HEART, is about reconciling those choices in one's heart.
But it's not easy reconciling a life's journey in one's heart, especially if that journey had traumatic moments which have never been let out to see the light of day... consciously, that is. And this film, a short, narrative adaptation of Edgar Allan Poe's "The Telltale Heart," has taken me into my own 'heart of darkness' parallel to the challenges one has in making a film.
When I was five, I was made to be a victim, over and over again. The trouble with being victimized when you are that young is that all it does is set you up for a life of victimization and abuse -- a finely lined walk between the roles of victim and abuser -- unless you get serious help.
I never told anyone about it and held it in for years -- held it in so tightly that my life depended on it. Faith, work, sports and understanding angels disguised as "mortal" friends made it all bearable. And yet, in retrospect, I would guess that many people close to me saw it, suspected it. Still, I was so sure I could fool everyone into thinking I was fine and my world was perfect.
Our society walks a fine line between dictating perfection and individualism any way. Always trying to be perfect and fit in perfectly... even when you don't want to and you shouldn't. Let's face it: perfection is an obsessive illusion.
And so, as it often goes with one's psyche, all of the hurt and pain and trauma had to be let out some way, some time; for me, that all came out in the creation of HER TELLING HEART. It's one thing if you just write a piece and be done with it. It's another, altogether, if you see it through from start to finish on screen.
More soon... see the next post coming soon...
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
She is Able Who Thinks She is Able
When you decide to focus your energy on the open doors in your life, rather than crying about those blasted closed ones, you begin to see just how full your plate really is...
This week, for example, I've got A LOT going on:
Scene study with Terry Schreiber at Terry Schreiber Studios, Arts and Entertainment Board of Schenectady Board Meeting, pre-production meetings for the September shoot of my next short film, HER TELLING HEART, and a screening of my MPI thesis film, A FORK IN THE ROAD at Symphony Space in NYC as an official part of the shorts program for the Manhattan Film Festival.
Of course, trying to juggle it all on a freelancer's budget -- that's another thing altogether.
And then, in the midst of writing this blog, I receive my morning quote from Bongo Productions on facebook:
The short, written, produced and directed by Heidi Philipsen, which features acclaimed Michigan actors, Grant Krause, Barbara Coven, Matt Andersen and Shelby Howe, will be screening on Thursday, July 22nd, at 7:45 p.m..
All Manhattan Film Festival screenings are to take place at Symphony Space on the upper West Side of Manhattan.
http://www.symphonyspace.org/event/6314-manhattan-film-festival-the-things-we-carry-?source=calendar
and use promotional code RAC102 for a $2 discount, which makes tickets purchased in advanced only $8!
This week, for example, I've got A LOT going on:
Scene study with Terry Schreiber at Terry Schreiber Studios, Arts and Entertainment Board of Schenectady Board Meeting, pre-production meetings for the September shoot of my next short film, HER TELLING HEART, and a screening of my MPI thesis film, A FORK IN THE ROAD at Symphony Space in NYC as an official part of the shorts program for the Manhattan Film Festival.
Of course, trying to juggle it all on a freelancer's budget -- that's another thing altogether.
And then, in the midst of writing this blog, I receive my morning quote from Bongo Productions on facebook:
"He is able who thinks he is able." Buddha
Thus, I view at all the challenges, financial, spacial and time-wise as such -- look at what I am able to do on a shoe-string budget, with only 24 hours in the day, spread out between Upstate, NY, NYC and Michigan (what I call my posse' triangle) and image the possibilities when I'm in the position to take the next step!
According to Buddha, the first step is opening my self up to being able to believe that I'm able. Combine that with Einstein's Theory of Relativity, and all I need to do is close my eyes, think happy thoughts, and push on through toward next week.
The short, written, produced and directed by Heidi Philipsen, which features acclaimed Michigan actors, Grant Krause, Barbara Coven, Matt Andersen and Shelby Howe, will be screening on Thursday, July 22nd, at 7:45 p.m..
All Manhattan Film Festival screenings are to take place at Symphony Space on the upper West Side of Manhattan.
http://www.symphonyspace.org/event/6314-manhattan-film-festival-the-things-we-carry-?source=calendar
and use promotional code RAC102 for a $2 discount, which makes tickets purchased in advanced only $8!
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